April 2025 marks SEVEN years since learning the truth that changed my life and, in some ways, who I am as a person. I pray year seven brings completion and blessing that is beyond anything I could ask or imagine (Ephesians 3:20).
Here are some life lessons I’ve learned since that fateful time…
The human capacity for grief is tremendous.
A person’s grief is proportional to the depth of their love. To love deeply risks being hurt deeply.
You can feel as if grief has swallowed you whole.
You can want to live for your children but have little will beyond that.
It’s possible to lose the will to live without being suicidal.
The physical body’s will to survive is tremendous.
A mother’s will to survive for her children is greater than anything.
The stages of grief are real but not in any set progression and certainly not linear.
Healing is in layers, so you may grieve anew when you reach a deeper layer.
Healing cannot be rushed.
You’ll want healing to happen sooner than it will.
You’ll want a lot of things to happen sooner than they will.
Trying to make things happen won’t make you feel better.
Pushing things down deep will only make you feel better for so long, then you have to dig those things up and heal from them too.
Journaling is a safe outlet for untangling a deeply rooted mess.
Counseling is imperative to untangling the deeply rooted messes.
In the beginning, you’ll think that you will never be ok again.
One day, you’ll wake up feeling more than ok again.
The thing that seemed like the worst thing will prove to be good for you.
You’ll grow.
You’ll do things you never thought you could.
You’ll find ways to dig deeper and stand taller.
You’ll become neutral to the thing that broke you.
You’ll become optimistic about the future.
You’ll see that beauty can come from brokenness.
You’ll be thankful.