…from a sleep-deprived rambling mind.
I remember the grandmother who raised me saying, “You’ll never know how much your heart can love till you have your own children.” And she was right.
I remember when I was pregnant with my second child and terrified I wouldn’t be able to love the first as well once I had two to love. How silly of me to think that a mother’s love gets divided. It actually multiplies. Miraculously, a mother’s capacity for love just gets bigger with each kid and bigger for each kid.
You watch them grow and learn and shape into their own person.
You nurture what God made in them while simultaneously praying that God helps you one day release them to the purpose for which He made them.
You know His plan for them is gonna be great bc…how could one person be made with all that good stuff without being created for big things?
Your heart swells with pride till it flows from your eyes….and your heart hurts sometimes till it flows from your eyes.
You smile down at them so fondly until one day you’re smiling up at them instead.
You kneel to bandage their boo-boos. You kneel to ask God to heal their heartaches.
You answer their questions until you think you’re losing your mind.
You hope to God they’ll ask you questions so you don’t lose your mind. You teach them ABCs and colors. They teach you how to operate your phone 😂.
You learn that a mother’s love is the closest thing to God’s love. You learn, in parenting, the depth of love our Father has for us.
You become the ballpark mom and the Momma Bear – the best and worst versions of yourself.
If you have several kids, you go from helicopter mom to “he’ll only do it once” mom.
You pray all their lives for the someone God made to love them more than you. Even if you can’t fathom it.
You sense your relationship changing as they mature, and it’s the most beautiful, bittersweet thing you’ve ever known.
You know one day the relationship will change again, and you’ll be the one needing care. You pray they never have to diaper you or pick you up after a fall…while simultaneously praying they’ll forgive you if they do.
You love them enough to want to save them from the hard stuff, even if that hardest thing is the eventual role reversal.
Someone said to me recently, “You know, our moms take care of us till one day we take care of them,” and I see both the beauty and the tragedy of that cycle.
Kids grow up. Parents grow old. We start as one and become the other. It’s up to us to make the most of our moments.
I say rock your baby longer. Squeeze your children tighter. Pour every good thing you can into them. Sit with your momma longer. Hold her hand tighter. Soak up every good thing she pours into you.
Set examples of love in both the way you care for your children and the way you care for your parent. When it’s your turn, allow your kids to take care of you and love them through that too.